Romance can feel different after 40, shaped by experience, greater self-knowledge and a clearer sense of what truly matters. In Encore: The best is yet to come, Susannah Schofield OBE and Johnny Nelson MBE explore this stage of life with refreshing honesty, warmth and humour.
Their book speaks directly to people who have survived heartbreak, divorce or major personal change and still feel curious about companionship. It offers reassurance for anyone asking whether love, intimacy and excitement can flourish again.
A New Chapter Deserves Its Own Rules
Society often treats romantic milestones as if they should follow a fixed schedule. Real life rarely moves so neatly. People of the same age can find themselves in completely different circumstances, each carrying their own responsibilities, memories and hopes.
One person may be starting a family while a friend becomes a grandparent. Someone may be rebuilding life after divorce, while another celebrates decades with the same partner. Some are actively dating, and others are quietly considering whether they’re ready to try again.
Encore recognises this variety and gives readers permission to follow a personal timeline. Its message feels especially relevant for people who have spent years caring for families, building careers or recovering from difficult relationships. Their desire for connection still deserves attention.
Starting again can require considerable bravery. Past experiences influence trust, expectations and emotional boundaries. Dating also brings practical questions that may feel unfamiliar after years away from it. Susannah and Johnny address these realities in a straightforward way, creating a welcoming space for conversations that people may struggle to begin elsewhere.
The book presents later-life romance as a meaningful opportunity for renewed confidence and discovery. Readers are encouraged to acknowledge what they’ve learned, understand what they want and approach the future with curiosity.
Honest Answers From Both Sides
The fourteen chapters in Encore are built around questions that many people consider privately. These questions cover love, sex, heartbreak, confidence, attraction and the emotional challenge of allowing someone new into an established life.
Each author responds separately, giving readers two personal viewpoints on the same subject. Susannah may interpret an experience in one way, while Johnny brings a different emotional history to the discussion. Their answers create a lively exchange that feels natural, candid and relatable.
This format strengthens the book because relationships are rarely understood through one viewpoint. Readers can recognise their own thoughts in one response and gain a fresh perspective from the other. The moments of disagreement also show how two people can approach the same concern from different places.
Humour keeps the conversations approachable. Dating after 40 can involve awkward introductions, changing bodies, complicated family circumstances and uncertainty about modern expectations. Encore handles these moments with sensitivity while allowing readers to laugh at the strange situations that often accompany a return to romance.
Psychological case studies appear throughout the book, connecting individual stories with broader emotional experiences. They help readers see that fear, hesitation and confusion are common responses to change. This added insight gives the personal conversations greater depth and may help people feel less isolated in their concerns.
The book emerged from Noir, the members’ club created for people exploring dating and intimacy during the second half of life. That background gives Encore a strong understanding of the questions its audience is already asking.
Published by Perkins Press and available in Kindle and paperback editions, the book is designed for anyone who has been hurt by love and has begun wondering what could happen next.
About the Authors
Susannah is an entrepreneur, published author, BBC Radio contributor and founder of Noir. Through her professional work and personal experiences, she has developed a close understanding of the doubts, desires and practical concerns surrounding relationships after 40. Her voice brings empathy, confidence and openness to the book.
Johnny is the longest-reigning WBO cruiserweight world champion of all time and one of Britain’s most recognisable Sky Sports Boxing voices. He has spoken openly about mental health and the emotional reality behind a public career. His reflections reveal a thoughtful perspective on vulnerability, love and starting over.
Together, Susannah and Johnny understand what it means to recover, reassess and step forward again. Their distinct experiences give the book its engaging rhythm and emotional range.
The Next Act Awaits
Encore: The best is yet to come reminds readers that age doesn’t remove the desire for affection, intimacy or adventure. Every new chapter begins with uncertainty, yet it can also carry unexpected promise.
Through frank questions, thoughtful answers and shared humour, Susannah and Johnny encourage people over 40 to remain open to possibility. The past may shape the story, while the pages ahead are still waiting to be written.
We had the privilege of interviewing the author. Here are excerpts from the interview:
Thank you so much for joining us today! Please introduce yourself and tell us what you do.
I’m Susannah Schofield OBE, an author, businesswoman, speaker and founder of Noir. I’ve had quite a varied career. I spent 15 years at Royal Mail, ultimately as Sales & Commercial Director, and today I’m Director General of the Direct Selling Association UK & Ireland. I’ve always been fascinated by people, entrepreneurship and what makes us tick. But the latest chapter of my life is perhaps the most personal. I’m the founder of Noir, a new wellbeing and community platform created for people navigating the realities of life after 40, and I’m also the co-author of Encore, a book about relationships, identity, dating and starting again in midlife. At 51, I’m certainly not interested in slowing down. If anything, I think I’m just getting started.
Please tell us about your story and journey.
Like so many people, the life I have today isn’t necessarily the life I imagined I would have. I’ve built businesses, had a successful corporate career, raised two daughters, received an OBE, and experienced some incredible highs professionally. But I’ve also been through separation, major life changes, and those moments where you suddenly have to stop and ask yourself: Who am I now? That question became increasingly important to me. When relationships change, children become more independent, our bodies change, careers evolve, and we reach a different stage of life, it can feel as though society expects us to quietly settle down. I don’t believe that for a second. I became fascinated by what happens next. What happens to love? Sex? Confidence? Ambition? Identity? Dating? Friendship? And how do you rediscover yourself when you’ve spent decades being somebody’s partner, somebody’s parent, or fulfilling a professional role? Those conversations eventually became Encore and, on a much bigger scale, Noir.
What inspired you to write Encore?
I wanted to write the book I couldn’t find. There are plenty of books telling us how to survive divorce, how to date, or how to navigate menopause, but real life doesn’t conveniently happen in separate categories. You might be dealing with children leaving home while your marriage is changing. Your career might be thriving while your confidence has disappeared. You might feel fantastic professionally but terrified about taking your clothes off in front of somebody new. And you can be incredibly successful and still have absolutely no idea how to send a dating message! Encore is about those contradictions. It’s an honest conversation about what it means to start again, particularly after 40, and the baggage, humour, mistakes, sex, relationships, confidence and opportunity that come with it. The title says everything for me. The first act isn’t the whole performance. There can absolutely be an encore.
How did the idea for Noir grow from that?
Writing and talking about these subjects made something very obvious to me: people don’t just need information. They need somewhere to belong. That’s why I created Noir. The principle behind it is very simple: find yourself before you find others. Noir isn’t simply a dating platform. Dating comes later. We are beginning with wellbeing, education, expert support, and community. Someone might come to Noir because their marriage has ended. Someone else might be navigating menopause, loneliness, body confidence, intimacy or children leaving home. Another person might simply wake up one morning and think, I’ve spent years looking after everybody else. What do I want now? You don’t need to be ready for another relationship. You just need to be ready to invest in yourself.
Why do you believe something like Noir is needed now?
Because there is an enormous, vibrant group of people in their 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond who I don’t think are being spoken to properly. We’re not finished. We’re not invisible. And we’re certainly not all sitting at home waiting to grow old gracefully! We’re starting businesses, travelling, dating, having sex, falling in love, getting divorced, changing careers and completely reinventing ourselves. But we’re also navigating some difficult things, and often doing it quite privately. Noir creates a grown-up, trusted environment where we can talk honestly about the subjects that matter, including relationships, confidence, sex, intimacy, health, wellbeing and starting again. I want people to come into Noir and have that wonderful feeling of: “Oh thank goodness. It’s not just me.”
What do you think people get wrong about starting again later in life?
That starting again means you’ve failed. I completely reject that. A relationship ending doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship was a failure. A career change doesn’t mean the previous career was wasted. Realising at 50 that you want something different doesn’t invalidate the first 50 years. You’ve learnt. You’ve changed. Hopefully you’ve become a little braver and much clearer about what you will and won’t accept. We talk about baggage as though it’s automatically negative. At this age, of course we’ve got baggage. We’ve lived! The important question is whether you’re carrying your baggage thoughtfully or asking somebody new to carry it for you.
What have you learnt about relationships and dating after 40?
Chemistry still matters enormously. I don’t think we’re ever too old for butterflies. But hopefully we become better at understanding that chemistry and compatibility aren’t necessarily the same thing. When we’re younger, we can build a life together from scratch. Later, two established lives are trying to come together. There may be children, ex-partners, careers, homes, financial independence, and decades of experience involved. That’s complicated. But I also think dating later in life can be incredibly exciting because you have an opportunity to choose differently. The challenge is knowing yourself well enough to recognise what you actually want rather than simply repeating what you’ve always known.
Noir talks quite openly about sex and intimacy. Why was that important to you?
Because we’re grown-ups and sex doesn’t suddenly disappear when you turn 40. Yet there is still an extraordinary embarrassment around talking about desire, intimacy, changing bodies, menopause, erectile difficulties, confidence, and what we actually want sexually. I want Noir to approach those conversations intelligently and without sensationalising them. Intimacy is part of wellbeing. Feeling desirable, connected and comfortable in your own body matters. And sometimes simply discovering that other people are experiencing exactly the same thing can be enormously reassuring.
What are the strategies that helped you become successful in your journey?
Resilience, curiosity, and being prepared to change direction. I’ve never believed that success comes from having one perfect plan and following it relentlessly. Some of the most important things I’ve done have happened because the original plan didn’t work. I’ve also learnt not to be frightened of starting again. I ask questions. I surround myself with people who know things I don’t. I listen to advice, but ultimately I’m prepared to make a decision and take responsibility for it. And perhaps most importantly, I keep moving. You can spend years waiting until you’re completely ready. Sometimes you have to start walking and trust yourself to work out the route along the way.
What does success mean to you now compared with when you were younger?
It’s changed enormously. When I was younger, success was much easier to measure: job titles, targets, money, recognition and the next promotion. Those things still matter, but they’re not enough anymore. At this stage of my life, success is freedom. It’s meaningful work, extraordinary experiences, my daughters, good people around me, laughter, intimacy, health, and being excited about what’s coming next. Success now is being able to look at my life and recognise myself in it.
What do you hope readers take away from Encore?
Permission. Permission to change your mind. Permission to want more. Permission to leave something that no longer works, to fall in love again, to have great sex, to reinvent yourself, to be ambitious, to be vulnerable, to make mistakes and occasionally have absolutely no idea what you’re doing. You don’t have to have your entire future mapped out. You just have to believe there is still a future worth getting excited about. That’s what Encore means to me.
What is your ultimate ambition for Noir?
I want Noir to become the trusted community for navigating later life. Not somewhere you visit only when something has gone wrong, but somewhere that helps you make what’s next even better. I want incredible experts sharing genuinely useful knowledge. I want conversations people aren’t having elsewhere. I want friendships and communities to form. And eventually, for those who want it, I want genuine romantic connections too. But I never want Noir to lose the human element. Technology can introduce us. Content can educate us. Experts can guide us. But ultimately people need people. Real Connections. Real Confidence. Real Chemistry. That’s what we’re building.
What message would you give to our readers?
Please don’t write yourself off because you’ve reached a certain age or because life hasn’t gone according to plan. Some chapters end. Sometimes painfully. But an ending creates space. You are allowed to decide that you want something different. You are allowed to rediscover who you are. And you are absolutely allowed to believe that some of the most exciting experiences, relationships, and achievements of your life haven’t happened yet. Don’t fear the next chapter. Make it your Encore.
Thank you so much, Susannah, for giving us your precious time! We wish you all the best for your journey ahead!
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